Theme:   Love Sex and Marriage - How to Keep Your Marriage Growing

This eDevotional was written by a volunteer from Timberlake Church.

READ: Matthew 6:14; Luke 23:34

THINK: The bible gives us a certain and sure way of making almost any relationship better - forgiveness.  C. S. Lewis said: "Everyone thinks forgiveness is a lovely idea until he has something to forgive." So true isn’t it? But here’s the interesting part, it's not until forgiveness becomes personal and costs us something that it takes on real significance and meaning.

I have to believe that some of what troubles us about forgiveness is that maybe we don't understand what it is . . . and what it isn't. Forgiveness doesn't mean:

• Excusing what someone did to you
• Forgetting what happened
• Denying, or stuffing, your feelings
• Reconciling instantly every time

It does mean:

• Embracing the offender—Christ modeled forgiveness at its best when He forgave and welcomed back those who hurt Him the most.
• Being proactive—When Jesus said from the cross, "Father, forgive them; for they do not know what they are doing" (Luke 23:34), He was forgiving people before they even asked for it.
• Surrendering the right to get even—especially in marriage, is letting go of our rights to punish and see justice done.

In marriage, or any relationship really, forgiveness is evident when one spouse or person stops demanding repayment for hurt feelings and wounded pride.

The three most powerful words we can speak to one another aren’t I love you… but the words "I forgive you". When those words become a regular part of your interaction and communication, you know your marriage is becoming all that it was meant to be—a relationship in which forgiveness can flow at the slightest offense… and the greatest ones as well.

DO: Practice right where you are – in your mind or out loud… say those three words. I forgive you. Now think about a troubling situation your having with your husband or wife (or any relationship really). And say it again three times emphasizing a different word each time: I forgive you… I FORGIVE you… I forgive YOU. Which is most difficult? That might help reveal what part of the forgiveness process your struggling with most, and need to deal with first.

PRAY: Jesus you modeled perfect forgiveness, and we need your help to even come close to being able to show that to the ones we love. Father, we ask that you would help us to forgive as You forgive. Give us the same heart You have for the people in our lives. Show us how You see them. Help me to always be mindful of all that You’ve forgiven of me. And in that same spirit I want to be loving and forgiving to those in my life. In Jesus’ name – Amen.